I have to start by saying that this has, without a doubt, felt like the quickest year on record. Don’t you think? It’s absolutely FLOWN by, and when I think back and reflect on what has gone down this year, I actually feel like I’m still in January 2018…. Whoosh.
When I looked back at my 2017 reflections, and the lessons I learnt that year, what I’ve realised is that some of the things I thought I knew –
“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.”
– MAYA ANGELOU
Stop and start. And again… times a few hundred.
An old story that has weaved its way though my life, and one that I wholeheartedly want to (and need to) rewrite.
Today isn’t the first day of a new year. Or a new month. Or even a new week. It’s just a run of the mill Tuesday.
“Owning your seat at the table.”
I’ve heard this phrase used a lot recently, and it continues to hit me right in the heart.
For a long time, I didn’t own my seat at the table. In fact, I wholeheartedly believed that I didn’t deserve to be in the room, let alone sitting at the table.
But with age, and wisdom, and insight, and let’s be honest –
“One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well.” -Virginia Woolf
It feels like it’s always been there. That niggle. The voice. You know, the one that says “you shouldn’t have that”.
The voice that shoulds all over a nice meal. The one that labels the things we eat as “good” or “bad”. I don’t even know where it came from.
It’s time to just hit post.
“But what if my website isn’t perfect?”
“What if it doesn’t really reflect me anymore?”
“What if no one really cares about or reads blogs anymore?”
“What if I actually don’t have anything to offer?”
What if. What if. What if.
Excuses. Excuses. Excuses.
The noise is loud.
But my heart?
Without a doubt, I’m a curious person. I love to seek, discover, and of course google. In this crazy, fast-paced world we have so much information at our fingertips (I’m getting somewhere, I promise) that for a curious soul like me it can actually become a little overwhelming. The desire to learn all of the thingscan get a little out of control.
My seeking nature also means that whirling around in my head is probably too much information at times.
“Honestly and transparency make your vulnerable. Be honest and transparent anyway.” – Mother Teresa.
It can be a scary thing to share our voices. Our true voice. The one that’s aligned to our soul.
It’s easy to strive for perfection, but in turn we not only lose our voice – but we lose the essence of what we are trying to speak about in the first place.
The thing is,